“Mommy look, baby!”

Hey everyone, I hope y’all are having a great week so far!

I want to speak briefly about something that happened at the public school Lucina receives speech at.

While waiting in the office for the school therapist to pick her up, a mother walked in with her son. He looked to be about AJ’s age, but was more medically complex. He was in a wheelchair, non-speaking and had a cool design bib around his neck.

Of course we have masks on, but I smiled anyway when they entered the office; habit I guess.

Then Lucina points to the family and says: “Mommy look, baby!”

I’m sure if I wasn’t where I am now in life, I would have felt so embarrassed that my daughter may have insulted someone unintentionally!

 I didn’t. Let me tell you what I did instead.

I gently moved her arm down to stop the pointing (which is a normal thing 3 year olds do) and said: “He’s not a baby silly, he’s a big boy!”

The mom smiled and replied “Yea. Don’t worry, he’s always his moms baby though.”

Intrigued, Lucina started spouting off all the things she saw on his wheelchair or body.

Lucina: “Mom, red shoes!”

Me: “Cool huh? You have white shoes.”

Lucina: “Mom, black backpack!”

Me: “That’s a nice bag, you have a flower backpack.”

Lucina: “Mom, big boy?”

Me: “Yup, and you are a big girl. He’s going to class, just like you.”

Instead of making the situation awkward or even shutting it down, I made sure to teach Lucina that yea, he has different items but at the end of it all, they were both kids waiting to go to class.

She walks, he is in a wheelchair – they are both kids who get where they need to be. She has white shoes, he red – they both have shoes they like. It’s okay to not be the same in every way. That doesn’t make anyone less than or a baby.

Mind you, Lucina is being raised in a very inclusive household and this still happened. It’s bound to happen. Children are curious. Let’s not shun them when they see something new; let’s talk about and most of all, acknowledge what and or who they see.

I follow many special needs families on Instagram, so I can’t remember exactly who shared it (otherwise I’d totally credit them), but they spoke about NOT looking away.

Growing up in our time, we were always told “Don’t stare, it’s rude!”

Could you imagine being on the other end?

You see a peer look at you, get excited for a possible new friend, then their parents maneuver them away from your direction.

Yea, it’s gotta be an awful thing to feel.

I’m not saying stare down and point, just say hi if the circumstances allow. It’s nice to be seen!

Let’s take unplanned moments and make them teachable. That is the only way we build a better, more inclusive world.

❤ Until next blog – Suhay